I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
