I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Randomize
