I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
So squirting runs in the family.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize