Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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