Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
