worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
