i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
