Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
My ass is underappreciated
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
