She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
All I want is dick and wine.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
