My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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