New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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