tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
