I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I'm passing your future prison.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
