Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
