her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
