I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize