Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
This girl is more easily done than said...
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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