I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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