How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
