Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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