Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
