Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
We talked him into tasing himself.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
