I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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