i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
