I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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