I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
