I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize