SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
We need to feng shui this bitch.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
