no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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