Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
