he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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