We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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