If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
