I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
