Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize