Porn is love you can see.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
