I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
