just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
