Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
