No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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