he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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