he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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