just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Randomize
