Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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