is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize