i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
