Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
