He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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