WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
