I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
