this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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