Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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