imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Dicks are not precious.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Randomize
